Parenting after separation
Separating is hard, tough on adults and sometimes even more difficult for children. It might be helpful if you can:
- Accept that your ex-partner is still a parent and has an important role in your child’s life and it’s best to try shared parenting as long as it is safe.
- If you can’t agree and end up going to court, the judge will look to try to involve both parents in the child’s life, with a shared parenting arrangement that is best for the child.
- The judge will also expect you and your partner to think about how family mediation could help.
Shared parenting is a collaborative arrangement after divorce or separation in which both parents have the right and responsibility of being actively involved in the raising of their child or children.
- Try to remain focused on the needs of your child rather than your ‘right’ as a parent.
- A parenting_plan can be a useful tool to help you focus on the needs of your child and give you the opportunity to think through their needs.
- Focus on building a business-like relationship with your former partner when making arrangements for the children. A family mediator can help you with this.
- Don’t have adult discussions in front of the children, particularly if you are finding it hard to agree.
Where can I go next?
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One Space - co-parenting support
Talk to other single parents and get support from single parenting specialists to get the best out of co-parenting.
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Families need Fathers - what is shared parenting
Information and support from Families need Fathers to help you learn more about shared parenting.
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Netmums - arranging access/contact with your children
Information and tips from Netmums to help you learn how to make shared custody work for your children.