Communicating with your ex-partner
It’s important to work towards better communication in any relationship. When it comes to ex-partners, your communication is going to have to be better than ever so you can work together to bring up your child.
Better communication may help you to work well together when you are making arrangements and dealing with any issues with your children.
There are a number of principles for better communication:
- Accept that your ex-partner is your child’s other parent, and as such they will always have a part to play in your child’s life – unless there are some serious safety and welfare issues.
- Be polite and treat them like you want to be treated.
- Listen to what your ex-partner is saying. Try not to use phrases that sound like accusations, like ‘you never …’ or ‘you always …’. Using these words would just inflame the situation and make matters worse.
- Think about other forms of communication (text, email, telephone) and agree a time and place to communicate.
- When you find something works keep going. If it stops working, try something new.
- A Parenting Plan can be helpful as it gives you both the opportunity to focus on your child’s needs.
By taking these principles into consideration you can work on improving your levels of communication, hopefully making life a lot easier for both you and your child.
Where can I go next?
The Parents Connection - tips for helping you communicate with your ex
Tips and advice from the Parent Connection to help you communicate better with your ex.
Centre for Separated Families - Improving Communications
Information on how to better communicate with your ex after separation, brought to you by the Centre for Separated Families.
Child Maintenance Options - Discussion guide
A guide to help you choose where, when and how you want to talk with your child's other parent, as well as organising what issues you want to talk about.